I hated bringing everything up and feeling all that pain again. All the sting and the pain and laughs and the tears. All the ups and downs of past relationships. So I eventually told him everything on my mind. I need to keep it to myself." When I denied telling him, he kept pressing me until I did. I thought, "He doesn't need to listen to this. It seemed incredibly selfish of me to do that. Then, one day, he sat me down and with a blank face he said, "Tell me everything that happened." At first, I denied. And I always felt incredibly guilty, because my current boyfriend would always have to hear about it. I couldn't seem to get over my past relationships and I could still feel the sting of the bad relationships. I thought so, too, just a few months ago. Moving on seems like a giant, impossible task to tackle. There are many people in our lives we are attached to and will always care about even if they are not in our physical presence. An attachment doesn't have to be played out in real life, or formulate a relationship, to be meaningful. Perhaps you aren't meant to be together in life, and your attachment is simply a spiritual one.
People want to be with someone who has their own life and their own character. People are not going to want to be with you if the only thing in your life is them. Don't make them the center of your universe. Just be your self, and keep your life going, and hope that they will see the light. But keep in mind that other people have the right to do what they want also, and that if it truly is right for you to be together, don't beg, and don't trash them if they don't see that yet. It may be possible to get the person or thing you miss back. You can find a new attachment while still keeping the old one, but accepting that it simply won't play out in real life. You don't have to stop loving them in your mind, or stop remembering whatever it is you are attached to. As long as it does not keep you from being attached to other people. Otherwise, keeping the attachment in your heart is normal. But I believe it is often inappropriate to move on unless the other person definitely does not love you anymore, or if the relationship is unhealthy.
#Move on to full#
In an era full of materialism, which promotes attachment to wealth and objects, but disparages attachment to people and memories as unhealthy, this may seem like unusual advice.
It's possible moving on is not always the right choice.
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